Have you ever found yourself constantly seeking reassurance in your relationships, only to feel like you're pushing people away? Do you often struggle with paranoia and a strong desire to control your environment? This is what it is like for people who experience the effects of an anxious attachment style.
Individuals with anxious attachment often grapple with deep-rooted insecurities and fear of abandonment. These fears manifest in a variety of relationship dynamics, which we'll explore in this blog post.
Romantic Relationships:
In romantic partnerships, people with anxious attachment may cling tightly to their significant other, often requiring frequent affirmations of love and commitment. They might feel threatened by their partner's independence or become overly suspicious of their intentions, ultimately straining the relationship.
To illustrate how an anxious attachment style can affect a romantic relationship, let's consider the example of a couple, Tom and Sarah:
Tom and Sarah have been married for five years, and Tom exhibits an anxious attachment style. He often worries about Sarah's love for him and frequently questions her commitment to their relationship. Tom requires constant reassurance, which can be emotionally draining for Sarah.
Tom becomes easily jealous and often misinterprets Sarah's interactions with other men as a threat to their relationship. His insecurities lead him to monitor Sarah's social media activity and text messages, causing tension and arguments between them.
When Sarah spends time with friends or engages in hobbies without Tom, he feels threatened and abandoned. In response, he may try to control her activities and limit her social interactions, which can lead to feelings of suffocation and resentment for Sarah.
Tom's anxious attachment style also impacts their communication, as he tends to take even minor disagreements as a sign of impending abandonment. This makes it difficult for the couple to address conflicts constructively, as Tom becomes defensive and fixates on the fear of losing Sarah.
Friendships:
Anxious attachment can lead to possessive and needy behavior in friendships. These individuals may try to monopolize their friends' time, interpret minor disagreements as signs of rejection, or constantly seek validation.
Kayla and Emma have been friends for several years, and Kayla exhibits an anxious attachment style. She often feels insecure about their friendship and worries that Emma prefers other friends over her. Kayla frequently seeks reassurance from Emma, asking if she's a good friend or if Emma is angry with her.
When Emma spends time with other friends, Kayla becomes jealous and possessive, questioning Emma's loyalty. Kayla might guilt-trip Emma or try to monopolize her time, which can lead to feelings of suffocation and resentment.
Kayla's anxious attachment style also makes it difficult for her to handle conflict effectively. She tends to take criticism personally and becomes defensive, making it hard for Emma to express her feelings without fear of damaging their friendship.
Emma may find it challenging to maintain a healthy balance between her friendship with Kayla and her other relationships. The demands of Kayla's anxious attachment style can be emotionally draining and may ultimately put a strain on their bond.
Work Relationships:
Anxious attachment styles can manifest in the workplace in various ways, often leading to strained relationships and difficulties in team dynamics. Let's consider an example involving an employee named Alicia:
Alicia is a talented graphic designer who has an anxious attachment style. She frequently worries about her job security and is highly sensitive to feedback. She tends to overanalyze every interaction with her colleagues, searching for hidden meanings and potential signs of disapproval. This behavior often leaves Alicia feeling overwhelmed and anxious.
When working on group projects, Alicia becomes possessive of her tasks and struggles to trust her team members' competence and intentions. She has a strong desire for control, which leads her to micromanage others' contributions and refuse to delegate tasks, even when it would improve overall productivity. This behavior creates tension and frustration among her coworkers, and the team's overall performance suffers as a result.
Alicia's anxious attachment style also makes it difficult for her to maintain professional boundaries. She seeks constant reassurance from her boss, frequently requesting meetings to discuss her performance and progress. While this initially shows her dedication, her need for constant validation eventually becomes overwhelming and burdensome for her supervisor.
To improve her working relationships and overall well-being, Alicia could benefit from self-reflection and developing a better understanding of her attachment style. With time and effort, she can learn to manage her insecurities, build trust with her colleagues, and cultivate a healthier approach to her work and professional relationships.
Recognizing and understanding the ways anxious attachment affects relationships is the first step toward making positive changes. By developing self-awareness and practicing mindfulness, individuals with anxious attachment can learn to cope with their insecurities and develop healthier relationships.
Remember, breaking free from the cycle of anxious attachment requires patience, self-compassion, and the willingness to explore new ways of relating to others. The journey may not be easy, but the rewards are well worth the effort.

By Deborah Ashway, LCMHC, LCAS

#AnxiousAttachmentStyle #Relationships #Friendships #RomanticPartnerships #WorkplaceDynamics #Communication #Boundaries #SelfAwareness #EmotionalWellbeing #HealthyRelationships

In today's fast-paced world, where information is readily available at our fingertips and everything seems to move at breakneck speed, it's easy to forget the importance of patience. We've become so accustomed to instant gratification and quick fixes that we often overlook the value of taking things slow and steady. However, cultivating patience can have a profound impact on our mental and emotional well-being.
One of the most significant benefits of patience is a reduction in stress and anxiety. When we're patient, we're less likely to feel rushed or stressed, which can help alleviate feelings of anxiety and improve our overall mental health. Patience also leads to better decision-making, as it allows us to take the time to consider all of our options and make informed choices, rather than rushing into something we might regret later. Additionally, patience can enhance our relationships with others, as it helps us be more understanding and forgiving, leading to stronger and healthier connections. Finally, patience can help us build resilience, allowing us to persevere through challenges and setbacks and cope with difficult situations more effectively.
On the other hand, constant impatience can have detrimental effects on our mental and physical health. It can increase stress levels, contribute to poor decision-making, and strain our relationships with others. Moreover, chronic impatience can lead to various health issues, such as increased blood pressure, heart rate, and muscle tension.
Fortunately, patience is a skill that can be developed over time, and there are several practices that can help us cultivate this virtue. Mindfulness meditation, for instance, can help us become more aware of our thoughts and feelings, making it easier to recognize and manage impatience when it arises. Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) can also be beneficial in identifying and challenging negative thought patterns that contribute to impatience, such as catastrophizing or overestimating the importance of events.
Exercise is another practice that can help reduce stress and improve mood, which can make it easier to be patient in difficult situations. Finally, journaling can be a powerful tool for gaining perspective and processing our emotions, enabling us to cultivate patience over time.
While it's easy to get caught up in the frantic pace of modern life, taking the time to cultivate patience can yield numerous benefits for our mental and emotional well-being. By recognizing and practicing patience we can navigate life's challenges with greater ease and grace.

by Deborah Ashway, LCMHC, LCAS

#PatienceInAFastPacedWorld #MindfulnessMatters #BenefitsofPatience #CultivatingPatience #ReduceStressAndAnxiety #MakeBetterDecisions #ImproveRelationships #BuildResilience #MindfulnessMeditation #CognitiveBehavioralTherapy #ExerciseForMentalHealth #JournalingForPerspective #SlowDownAndThrive #EmbraceThePause #ThePowerOfPatience

Moral injury occurs when an individual experiences social, psychological, and
spiritual harm due to a betrayal of their core values. Here are some ways in which
moral injury can happen:
1. Acts of Commission: These occur when a person actively engages in behaviors that
conflict with their moral beliefs. For example, a soldier who must shoot an enemy
combatant may experience moral injury if they later discover personal details about the
deceased, such as seeing a picture of the dead man’s children 1 .
2. Acts of Omission: Moral injury can also result from failing to prevent harm or
wrongdoing. Imagine a situation where someone witnesses an injustice but feels
powerless to intervene. The guilt and shame from not taking action can lead to moral
injury 2 .
3. Acts of Betrayal: This type of moral injury often involves leaders or authority figures.
When those in positions of trust fail to protect their subordinates or violate ethical
norms, it can profoundly wound a person’s conscience. For instance, doctors facing
ethical dilemmas within the healthcare system may experience moral injury when
business interests conflict with patient care 1 .
4. High-Stakes Situations: Anyone caught in a life-or-death scenario with no good
choices can suffer moral injury. This includes therapists, human rights workers, first
responders, and survivors of abuse or violence. Even doctors, faced with decisions that
impact patients’ survival, may grapple with moral conflicts 13 .
In the military context, moral injury is widespread and linked to anxiety, depression,
PTSD severity, and suicide risk. Over 90% of veterans with PTSD exhibit symptoms of
moral injury, emphasizing its significant impact 1 . Similarly, doctors today face moral
dilemmas due to conflicts between healthcare practices and their deepest values 14 .


Remember that moral injury arises from circumstances, not character, and it can fundamentally alter a person’s worldview and ability to trust others.
TIPS for healing
Healing moral injury is a complex and deeply personal process, often requiring time,
effort, and support. Here are some tips that may help:

• Seek Professional Help: Consider seeking support from a therapist or counselor experienced in treating moral injury. They can provide guidance and tools tailored to your specific situation.
• 2. Self-Reflection: Take time to reflect on the events or experiences that have caused moral injury. Journaling or engaging in introspective practices like meditation can help you process your feelings and thoughts.
• 3. Seek Understanding: Try to understand the circumstances that led to the moral injury, including the choices and actions of others involved. This can help contextualize your feelings and promote empathy, forgiveness, or acceptance.
• 4. Connect with Others: Seek support from trusted friends, family members, or members of your community who can offer empathy, understanding, and companionship as you navigate your healing journey.
• 5. Engage in Meaningful Activities: Participate in activities that align with your values and bring you a sense of purpose and fulfillment. This can help rebuild a sense of meaning and identity that may have been affected by the moral injury.
• 6. Practice Self-Compassion: Be gentle with yourself and recognize that experiencing moral injury is a normal response to challenging situations. Treat yourself with kindness and understanding as you work through your feelings.
• 7. Explore Spiritual or Religious Practices: For some individuals, spiritual or religious practices can provide comfort, guidance, and a sense of connection to something greater than themselves.
• 8. Advocate for Change: If your moral injury stems from systemic issues or injustices, consider getting involved in advocacy or activism efforts aimed at addressing the underlying causes and promoting positive change.
• 9. Set Boundaries: Establishing healthy boundaries can help protect your emotional well- being and prevent further harm. This may involve distancing yourself from triggering situations or individuals, setting limits on your involvement in certain activities, or seeking support in enforcing boundaries.
• 10. Give Yourself Time: Healing from moral injury is a process that takes time and patience. Be patient with yourself and trust that with time and effort, you can find healing and peace.

By Tandy Hale, LCMHC, ATR-BC, NCC 

Social anxiety is a common mental health condition that affects millions of people worldwide. The fear of being judged, scrutinized or rejected in social situations can disrupt normal functioning and lead to avoidance of many activities. Fortunately, there are effective ways to manage social anxiety with practice and persistence. In this blog, we will discuss some tips and techniques that can help you overcome social anxiety and live a fulfilling life.

Understanding social anxiety
​Social anxiety, also known as social phobia, is a type of anxiety disorder that can range from mild to severe. It is characterized by intense fear or discomfort in social situations that involve interaction with others, such as public speaking, parties, dating, and small talk. Social anxiety can cause physical symptoms like sweating, trembling, blushing, palpitations, and nausea. It can also lead to negative self-talk, self-doubt, and self-consciousness.
Tips for managing social anxiety

1. Identify your triggers: Recognize what situations trigger your social anxiety, and try to face them gradually. Start with situations that are less distressing, such as talking to a friend, and work your way up to more challenging situations, like public speaking.
2. Challenge your negative thoughts: Social anxiety is often fueled by negative thoughts, such as “I’ll embarrass myself,” “people will judge me,” or “I’m not good enough.” Try to question these thoughts and replace them with positive ones. For example, “I’ve prepared well for this presentation,” “people are not perfect either,” or “I’m learning and growing.”
3. Practice relaxation techniques: Deep breathing, progressive muscle relaxation, and visualization can help you calm down and reduce physical tension. Practice these techniques regularly, so you can use them when you face an anxiety-provoking situation.
4. Learn assertiveness skills: Being assertive means expressing your needs, opinions, and feelings clearly and respectfully. Assertiveness can increase your confidence and reduce social anxiety. Practice assertiveness skills, such as saying “no” when you need to, asking for what you want, and speaking up for yourself.
5. Seek professional help: If your social anxiety is severe or interfering with your daily life, seek help from a mental health professional. Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) and medication can be effective treatments for social anxiety. CBT helps you change your negative thinking patterns and behaviors, while medication can reduce your symptoms.

ConclusionSocial anxiety can be a challenging condition to live with, but it is treatable. With the right guidance and support, you can learn to manage your social anxiety and enjoy social situations without fear. Remember, overcoming social anxiety takes time and effort, but it is worth it. Don’t let social anxiety hold you back from living the life you want.

By Jessica Whittington, LCSW, CCTP-II

#SocialAnxiety #MentalHealthMatters #AnxietyAwareness #Mindfulness #SelfCare #MindfulLiving #AnxietySupport #AnxietyHelp #Anxiety #EmotionalWellbeing

The inner critic is that pesky voice inside our heads that often focuses on our flaws, mistakes, or shortcomings.  It's like having a harsh judge constantly evaluating and criticizing our thoughts, actions, or appearance.  This inner voice can be relentless, causing self-doubt, lowering self-esteem, and sometimes leading to anxiety or perfectionism.  Managing the inner critic involves learning to recognize and reframe negative self-talk or limiting beliefs and replace them with more realistic and compassionate self-talk.


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Challenging the inner critic:

1. Awareness: Start by becoming aware of your inner dialogue.  Notice when negative thoughts or self-criticisms arise.  Awareness is the first step toward challenging them.
2. Question the Validity: When negative thoughts emerge, ask yourself if they're based on evidence or if they're assumptions or self-imposed beliefs.  Challenge their validity and ask for proof.
3. Reality Check: Consider if you would speak to a friend the way you speak to yourself.  Often, we're more critical of ourselves than we are of others.  Treat yourself with the same kindness you would offer a friend.
4. Replace Negative Thoughts: When a negative thought arises, consciously replace it with a positive or more realistic one.  For instance, if you think, "I'll never succeed," replace it with, "I am capable and learning from each experience."
5. Practice Self-Compassion: Treat yourself with kindness and understanding, especially during difficult times.  Practice self-compassion by acknowledging your struggles without judgment.
6. Challenge Perfectionism: Recognize that perfection is unrealistic.  Embrace the idea that mistakes are opportunities for growth and learning.
7. Reframe with Evidence: When the inner critic arises, counter it with evidence of your strengths, past successes, or times when you've overcome challenges.  Remind yourself of your capabilities.
8. Focus on Progress, Not Perfection: Shift your focus from achieving perfection to making progress.  Celebrate small victories and acknowledge the effort you put into your endeavors.
9. Seek Support: Share your struggles with a supportive friend, family member, or therapist.  Sometimes an outside perspective can provide insights and encouragement.
10. Mindfulness and Meditation: Engage in mindfulness practices to observe your thoughts without attachment.  Meditation can help you develop awareness and detach from negative thought patterns.

Challenging the inner critic is an ongoing process that requires patience and persistence.  Over time, with conscious effort, you can reframe negative self-talk and cultivate a more positive and empowering inner dialogue.

By Tandy Hale, LCMHC, ATR-BC, NCC

#InnerCritic #SelfCompassion #Mindfulness #PositiveMindset #InnerPeace #SelfLove #PersonalGrowth #MindsetShift #WellnessJourney #PositiveThinking #EmbraceYourself #InnerStrength #PositiveChange #SelfImprovement #MindfulLiving #Empowerment #BlogPost #InnerDialogue #MindsetMatters